THE Night OF LOVE AND FREEDOM


What is a NoLaF?

The Night of Love and Freedom is a Brussels based, invitation only sex-positive event. Since 2021, around 40 people connect every two months, to play and enjoy life in this brave space. Such a space is kind of a safer space that includes a diversity in terms of experience, with a stronger sense of personnal responsibility. It is a party of its own style, at the crossing of queer techno rave, kink and fetish scene, hedonistic games, artist gathering, and radical expression of self. It is a space where people who know and people who don't know can meet, share experience, connect, collide, take responsibility for their own boundaries, be assertive, learn from their mistakes by talking about them, and empower each other in this ever evolving experience.

Sweet or intense sexuality, casual chat, sensation play, power play, gender exploration, and a hot dancefloor meet in a very open mindset. No slutshaming, and no pressure to behave flirty either, just the freedom to be who you enjoy being. The intention behind the organisation of these parties is to create an empowering and liberating bubble, in which we invite a hand picked selection of people to get an experimental approach of what sexuality can be, allowing a transformative experience using vulnerability as a tool to connect, and humbly help each other to love better, physically and emotionally. And of course, to make some sexual fantasies happen ;-)


What is a Brave Space ?

Here is a poem by Micky ScottBey Jones that gives exactly the mindset we are aiming for.

Together we will create brave space
Because there is no such thing as a “safe space” —
We exist in the real world
We all carry scars and we have all caused wounds.
In this space
We seek to turn down the volume of the outside world.
We amplify voices that fight to be heard elsewhere,
We call each other to more truth and love
We have the right to start somewhere and continue to grow.
We have the responsibility to examine what we think we know.
We will not be perfect.
It will not always be what we wish it to be
But
It will be our brave space together
And
We will work on it side by side.


What to expect?

Expect a party that start at 2pm and ends at 8am. No entry after 3pm, so there won't be any unsuspected guest once the fire is up. Imagine a safe and queer space inviting sexiness, dances, deep discussions, kind touches, wild sex, a diversity of fantasies, a supportive dynamic and daring attitudes !  

It always takes place in a private house, most of the time our HQ in Etterbeek but sometimes it migrates elsewhere for an occasion. Several spaces are be available to you throughout the night. First, there is the dancefloor, with a hell of a sound-system to rock your booty all night long on the sounds of a carefully curated 16h homemade mixtape created by Julien, leading the groove from social connections to body energy, to slower sexy times, to jumping bangers, to psychedelic contemplation, like the original soundtrack of a movie that would take the whole night long to happen. Not two editions are the same, and the mix is in constant evolution. Connected to the dancefloor is the "wild space", multiple beds with many sex toys available, some BDSM contraptions and diverse accessories, welcoming all your sexual desires, to seamlessly come and go from dancing to sex however it suit you. If you need a less stimulating environment to connect intimately with your partner(s), the soft room on another floor will welcome you, where you can express your sensuality among muffled moans, use our massage table, and have some slow sex surrounded by meditative music, ideal for a more dedicated connection. In the kitchen you'll find all kinds of refreshments & snacks, mainly non alcoholic lemonades and mocktails with some light beers, but you can bring whatever you want to consume. Next to the dancefloor is a risk reduction space, to inform you and keep you safe. In the garden you can smoke and cool down. Lastly, the chill zone is a no-sex & no-nudity space, to rest the senses and socialize cozily.

No dresscode - wear whatever makes you feel sexy! Shiny makeup, elegant lingerie, disco slut, cuddle panda, creative cosplay, or comfy silky bathrobe, whatever! Feel the pleasure of indecency in a context where being overly sexy is not a danger anymore, but a source of power. And if you feel insecure about your body, know that there are many many differrent body types present, so don't overthink it. And if you want to take it slow and start the party with your streetwear before anything, you're very welcome. You may change as often as you like ! And if you have an elaborate kinky wardrobe, or a whole sex-toy collection, please do not hesitate to bring some to share.


Who can join?

Whether you're gay, lesbian, hetero, transexual, queer, girly femme, manly boy, or polygender creature - each event is a joyful mix of orientations and gender identities where we playfully explore different ways of connecting with each other. Give space to your inner self, freed from normative social pressure, whatever form it may take. 

However, you are expected to respect certain ground rules:

  • CONSENT: always ask, even before a friendly touch. Consent must be freely given, informed, specific and revokeable.
  • EMPOWERMENT: encourage each other to experiment, and congratulate each time someone expresses a “no”.
  • CONFIDENTIALITY: you can talk about the party, but cannot give any names of people you met at the party (and of course photos are forbidden).

Each person who receives an invitation email may bring a friend. But choose wisely -> you're responsible for the person that you bring along. Take care of them during the party, as it may be tricky for some to swim in these hot waters for the first time. Also, if they mess up, for instance by disrespecting consent or by bothering others, they will be immediately kicked out and your reputation will be on the line too. Depending on the gravity of the situation, you might be taken off the invitation list too.

Talking about bad behaviors, be aware that we really depend on you when it comes to know if something bad happens. The team stays available during the party if something goes wrong, and we systematically send an aftercare mail, inviting you to give feedback. Please be frank and transparent, so we can address any problem in a constructive way. Thank you for working with us on this !


How to register?

Only people who receive the invitation email can register. To avoid the invitation ending up in your spam folder, add the address [email protected] to your contact list.

STEP ONE: Reply to the invitation mail and mention whether or not you would like to bring a friend. Also mention if any of the following statements are true for you and your +1:  

  • you're an artist (video, photo, dance, music, theater, scenography, cabaret...)
  • you're a sexpositive activist, sex worker, intimacy professional, porn performer,...
  • you're LGBTQI+
  • you're a person of color
  • you haven't been able to participate since a while
  • you never had the chance to set foot in this kind of event, managed to gather the courage to join because you feel ready to explore while respecting yourself and others

After replying to the invitation, you are automatically added to the waiting list.

STEP TWO: On a date specified each time on the invitation, participants will be selected based on the criteria mentioned above. This selection aims to create a balanced and diverse party, keeping the original vibe alive while giving space for new people. If you don't check any of the criteria but there is enough space, you will be able to participate. 

Two weeks before the event, you will receive one of the following emails:

  • A confirmation email. All the practical infos will be given at that time.
  • A waiting list email. If a spot is freed closer to the date, you might be invited to join. And if you can't come this time, your chances are higher to participate to the following party !


Stay SAFE

Last but not least: we strongly encourage you to get tested for STI before the party. In fact, during the presentation circle, everyone will share their STI status, when was the last time you got checked. And if you got tested positive to something, you are still welcome! But be responsible, inform your playpartners, and use the risk reduction materials. There are many ways to adapt the erotic games so everyone stays safe, and there's literally bags of condoms and latex gloves at your disposal, and a bathroom accessible all night. Oh, and please bring your own towel ;-)